She Really DOES Love Him

I worry sometimes about my kids relationship. They seem to fight SO MUCH! I know it is perfectly normal. My sister and I fought all the time, and we get along fine now. But I still worry. Do they fight more than other siblings? Am I doing anything to make it worse? Should I be doing something to make it better? Will they hate each other when they grow up?

Then one of them does something to show me how much they really do love each other.

Bubbles has a stuffed cow (Cowy...original, right?) that is her very favorite thing. It is her security item...her wooby. She doesn't like anyone to touch it. We have a game where I steal it when she isn't looking and hide it somewhere so she can find it. That is ok, but no one else can touch it...especially Animal!

Animal is sick today. Fever, horrible cough, lethargic. Miserable. When Bubbles heard that he was sick and staying home from school, she muttered something sympathetic and went about getting ready for school. As she was heading down the stairs, she wandered into our room where Animal was resting and placed her beloved cow on the bed next to him. She told him that Cowy would help him feel better today and he could keep it until she got home from school.

I know it seems like a small thing, but that right there? That's LOVE! And it made me so very proud.

What Are the Odds that This Day Will Get Better?

So, I was going to be late for work anyway because of traffic. There were two accidents on the highway between my house and my office. I sat on the on ramp for 25 minutes before I was able to get to the escape lane to get back off. I decided (or actually Bear did...he was in the car ahead of me on the ramp) that the back roads were a better idea.

As I sat at a red light, I picked up my Wawa coffee cup, took the first sip of that life giving liquid and then went to place it back in the cup holder. As I did so, the disposable cup disintegrated in my hand and spilled 20 ounces of VERY hot coffee onto my lap, my steering wheel and my center console. OUCH!!! I uttered several explicit words and then switched lanes to go back home.

I knew this was probably a sign that I should get back in bed and write the day off, but I am saving up my leave for when Kimi comes to visit (in 9 DAYS!!!) so I was going to have to brave the day. After my second shower of the day and a fresh outfit, I started a load of laundry with my coffee soaked clothes in it, scubbed the inside of my car as clean as possible and got on the road again.

I was an hour and a half late for work and things have continued to go wrong all morning....

Is it Friday yet???

WHA???

I doubt very seriously that I will write much about work here, but I have to get this out.

I am an accountant. Mostly, I do accounts receivable and collections, though I am branching into other areas as the years go by. I don’t like GOING to work and I have issues with some of the people I work with, but I do really enjoy the work that I do.

Anyway, yesterday something happened that REALLY upset me.

I was processing a deposit, when I came across a check with a letter attached. The letter was addressed to a specific person, but it was clear that this person had not seen the letter or check. I needed to know where to put the money...had she seen it, she would have written this information on the letter for me. So, I called her up, told her what I had and asked if she knew anything about it.

OCW (obnoxious co-worker): Yes, I know about that.

ME: Well, can you tell me where to apply the money?

OCW (yelling into the phone): IF ONE MORE PERSON GIVES ME SOMETHING TO DO! CAN I JUST COME OVER THERE AND PUNCH YOU IN THE FACE?

Now, I certainly know how it feels to be overwhelmed by work and how every person has their breaking point. I am taking a mini vacation in a couple weeks when my BFF Kimi comes to see me, and I have LOTS to get done before that happens. I have several deadlines that MUST be met if I want to take time off. But I have NEVER spoken to a co-worker (or to anyone) like that before!!

I told this story to Bear last night, and he was really angry. He said I should have hung up and called her boss right away. He said I should have reported her to HR. He said I should have filed an official complaint. He is probably right.

I didn’t do any of those things. I sat in shocked silence for a few seconds and then I unleashed my temper (which I usually guard closely at work) on her. I didn’t say anything CLOSE to what she said to me, but I made it abundantly clear that it would not be in her best interest to speak to me like that again.

After I talked to Bear last night, I felt better. I vented and was ready to move on.

Then I saw her in the hall this morning…I got really upset and had to walk away quickly. I am undoubtedly overreacting, but this just really got to me. Thank goodness this is not someone I have to interact with on a regular basis!

End Vent.

Crafting - The Next Generation

So I have been working diligently (and happily) on my craft project for Kimi. I am just under 1/2 way done with it.

Yesterday, I was working away when Bubbles came up and asked if she could help me. I suggested that instead of helping me, she might like to learn how to do it and work on a small project of her own. She tried it very briefly last night, but then she got distracted by watching Twilight (she is her momma's little vampire loving girl!).

This afternoon, after we got home from a lovely thrift store expedition, she decided to get back to it. After several fits and starts, most probably due to my less than stellar teaching skills, she has the hang of it, and she is having a blast. She has been hard at work all afternoon and is already 1/2 done! She has altered her design a couple times and I think her final product is going to be gorgeous.

I am very excited to get back to crafting, but I have to say watching my daughter learn and find joy from it as well is AWESOME!!!

Gettin' Crafty!

Before I had kids, crafts were a BIG part of my life. I always had several projects going and I spent a lot of time on them. I took projects in the car on long trips to keep my hands busy. I worked on them while I watched TV (couldn't stand sitting completely idle). I had friends that I would get together with for the express purpose of gossiping and working on our various projects.

Then I had Bubbles.

First, there wasn't enough time in the day for all the things she needed plus the housework that needed doing, so crafting was OUT. I kept telling myself that as soon as she was a little older and independant, there would be time for it. When she hit the toddler years, there was indeed more time, but there were also little fingers to worry about. It was like she had CRAFT RADAR! As soon as I picked up a project, she was there...grabbing at the little pieces...getting too close to sharp needles and scissors..."helping Mama". What once was a relaxing hobby became extremely stressful. So, ok...I will put it away for a little longer...til she is just a little older. Then Animal came along and the whole cycle started again!

By the time he was old enough that crafting could be enjoyable again, I had gotten completely out of the habit. I have tons of supplies and plans, but it had sunk so low on the priority list, that I didn't even think about it when I was considering my options on a quiet Sunday afternoon.

Then, Kimi started talking about crocheting on her blog. And she posted pictures of the beautiful work she has done. Then, she promised to make me a blanket with my favorite colors! Then, she sent me a picture of the work in progress. WOW is she talented!!

I told her that I would make her something and she seemed excited. So I started thinking about what I could make. And just like that, I caught the bug again.

I spent the rest of the afternoon at work devising plans in my head. Before I left the office for the day, I did a little internet research. As soon as I walked in the door I started designing (I often create my own designs/patterns).

Bear came home to find Bubbles working on homework, Animal running wild through the house, and me sitting in my recliner sketching. Dinner wasn't started, the dishes weren't done, the laundry wasn't going (in my defense, Bear had to stop on his way home to get detergent, so I couldn't do laundry!).

Now, Bear has been with me for a LONG time, and he knows how obsessed I can get with my crafts, so he didn't say a word. He ordered dinner from a little Italian place down the street and even helped me dig through my supplies to find the things I needed. When dinner came, he served mine up and brought it and a glass of wine to me.

I spent the entire evening working on Kimi's surprise, and it was AWESOME! I don't know how great the finished product will be, but it just felt right. My crafts are once again relaxing. The kids were around, but really, they just wanted to see what I made. They had to go to bed before it really started looking like anything, but Bubbles saw my progress this morning and said it was pretty.

I hope to finish this project in the next week or so (I am trying to be responsible and not let the house and kids fall completely by the wayside). I already have another project in mind (for Kimi again!) and I am hoping to make this a regular part of my life again.

Thanks Kimi, for reminding me to make time for things that make ME happy!

Boys Will Be Boys...

Or Boys Will Be GROSS!!! You decide...

Our dog, Winston, is getting very elderly. With age has come the inability to hold his bowels as well as he used to. We are gone from the house for about 11 hours a day during the week. So there have been accidents.

Animal has always had an overactive gag reflex and a relatively weak stomach. Combine these two things, and he doesn't handle other people's (or creature's) bodily functions very well. Bubbles and I learned a long time ago that if we didn't want a bigger mess to clean up, it was wise to remove Animal from the scene as quickly as possible.

So, last night when we get home, the kids discover that Winston had an accident in the living room. By the time it was discovered, I was elbows deep in laundry in the basement, so I asked Bubbles to please clean it up.

Her first order of business was getting rid of Animal before the smell got to him. She came up with the perfect solution! Winston needed to go out anyway, so she told Animal to take the dog out and stay out there with him.

The next thing I know, Bubbles is downstairs in the laundry room with a look of utter disgust on her face.

Me: What's up?
Bubbles: Animal justed peed in the backyard!!!
Me: ???

When asked later (by his father...I wasn't touching this one!) why in the world he did this, his response was so sensible and yet still so disturbing: "Sissy wasn't done cleaning up the dog poop, and I hadta pee..."

How does one respond to that????

I SUCK!

Most days, I would tell you that I am a pretty decent mom. Not supermom or anything, but I think I do an ok job.

Tonight, though...I completely SUCK!!!

Tonight...I completely lost my cool...

Bubbles struggles with school. Not the learning part...she is actually quite smart and just kind of absorbs information from her surroundings. She struggles with staying on task, getting her work done in a timely manner, and focusing on her work. These problems also bleed over into her homework.

Tonight she was supposed to be doing read and responds. For this assignment, you read a short book or a chapter of a longer book and then write 3-5 sentences about what you read. We had already done the reading and a draft of the writing. All she had to do was copy the writing onto her homework form. She had 5 of these to do (so a maximum of 25 sentences). This took her 2 1/2 hours to accomplish. Then, when I was checking her work I found it riddled with errors. In one respond she had combined 3 sentences into one nonsensical mess. She had misspelled words that she has known how to spell since 1st grade. It was just ridiculous!

And I. Lost. It.

I yelled (something I do more often than I should). I berated. I made her cry...a lot. Then I sent her to bed (it was 10 PM after all). Then I sat here feeling awful.

Bear got home from a meeting at the fire station and I sent him up to talk to her. I told him that we had a fight and I was awful and mean, but I was still too angry to talk to her. He went up and did his best to fix the damage I had done.

After they talked, she came down to give me a kiss and hug, and I told her that I love her so very much. I will apologize for my behavior tomorrow, and being Bubbles, all will be forgiven. And I will do my best to be a better mom. And most days I will succeed.

But for now...I will just sit here feeling horrible....